Give Space

Photo by Arūnas Naujokas

We are given the space to live on Earth and we took most of it. Our physical reality feels more immediate because of how much time we devote to it. We therefor tend to accept mainly the things and beings that allow us to control them and then revolt against the weeds in ‘our’ garden, the birds flying above ‘our’ houses, the fly on the ceiling. We took ownership to the extend of thinking of ourselves as gods and goddesses, ironically disconnected from the bigger dialogue, from the universal sense of belonging.

So today, whichever day you are living, give space. Give space to life to manifest itself without the threat of the controlling mind. Give space to yourself to pause the thinking and the paining, the need for control. Look around you. Look inside you. Find a space for forgiving every moment, so that you don’t have to look back with pain and guilt. Find a space for love. You will see that love is not a memory or a five year plan. Love can only be felt in the present moment. Give yourself space to be.

Reflections inspired by ‘The Power of Now’, Eckhart Tolle.

Habit Stacking: the Magical Shortcut to Healthy Habits

Habit stacking is a technique that works great as long as we have a primary habit that’s strong enough to stack other habits on. For instance, if we tend to have dinner at the same time, we can stack on it the habit of taking a walk. After we’ve built a strong connection between the two habits, we can stack some more –> shower –> read ->> go to sleep

This means that even if we don’t have dinner on the dot every day, we can still comply by shortening the consequent activities. If we decide to do intermittent fasting and skip dinner, going for a walk will become the new anchor habit.

The main habit needs to be grounded within us so strongly that we don’t allow ourselves to have second thoughts about it, which is what makes morning habits and early rising a challenge for many of us.

Here’s some great practical advice on early rising from fellow blogger Steve Pavlina: https://www.stevepavlina.com/blog/2005/05/how-to-become-an-early-riser/

How to Reduce Your Stress Levels at Work

Managing stress at work is our responsibility. We can get lost in the heaviness of mindless work or pause, take a 5-10 minutes break and reset your focus.

How?

  • take time to meditate/quiet time
  • use the bathroom break to do some stretching
  • stand up and walk to the window if you have an office job
  • stand up when you take a phone call

Most importantly – remove yourself from stressful situations or confrontational conversations. People who are trying to take away the calm and seed anxiety are not worth the time investment. Ask them to send an email.

You might think that all these actions will only distract you from your work or that you will be seen as weak. But if you have a clear head you will be twice as effective. Living a conscious life takes time. So take the time you need to improve your life and to look after your wellbeing.

The New You Should Never Get Old.

‘Identity’ is an ever-morphing concept. We take pride in who we are from a young age and allow our preferences to dictate our identity. Preferences and not beliefs.

The first layer of conscious identity is forced on us by the views of our parents, carers, teachers – people. Before we get to take control of our narrative and even before we get to know who we are, we are aware of who we are expected to be.

It isn’t just the disconnect between what’s within us and what is projected on us that harms our potential, but also how imperceptible change is. What we don’t notice doesn’t get labelled which means that the old labels are out of date and trap us into falling into old patterns.

1 Minute Exercise:

Take one identity that really stands-out to you when you think about it eg. clumsy, know-it-all, lazy, serious. Think about experiences when you acted contrary to the general belief. What does this say about you?

The Story Within.

The internal narrative which is writing our lives has corners unexplored by the conscious mind. We cling on to things, identities, relationships which can only serve us well for a little while. Progress means recognition and acceptance of change.

Things. Everything that creates a hassle and brings us negative emotions.

Identities. Who am I? No, not who I was, who am I re-presenting now. And who do I want to be?

Relationships. Do I still need protecting or can I offer my help instead?

When we walk into a room our internal narrative will tell us how to behave, but like anything in life, it often needs upgrading and adjusting. Take a moment and evaluate your behavior, you might realize that you are long needed an upgrade.