Taking responsibility takes courage and a strong sense of self. It is a trait of an honorable person. But what if you’ve learnt early on that by taking responsibility you expose yourself to the vulnerability of being blamed? Blame is a negative emotion and it sits at the opposite side of the spectrum from taking responsibility. If it’s being projected on us, it reveals feeling that the other person has difficulty dealing with. By taking responsibility you can set a barrier between what matters and the void of being trapped in the past. Blame doesn’t exist in the present moment.
Our Past Doesn’t Define Our Future
We find relief in thinking that who we are is a sum of circumstances that led to our birth and to our upbringing. The place we were born in, the family we were raised by, access to education and opportunities. Yet times and times again people around us prove quite the contrary: against comfortable upbringing, who had challenges in life have better chances to succeed.
Life as an adult or an independent human being boils down to one thing: can we manage ourselves without being told or expected to do something? Having initiative and intention leads the road to growth. If we’re collecting degrees that say what we should be able to do, but we don’t quite feel capable of doing it without constant validation, we have failed.
Putting our trust in others to tell us who we are at every point in life, from junior employee to CEO means that we can’t manage our life. People who lacked what society labels as direction in life through a comfortable upbringing learn early in life that we can grow our own skills and no one can take away our learning experience away from us.