How Much Can We Handle?

Photo by Miguel Salgado

Self-doubt doesn’t show out of nowhere. Whenever we are given conditions or advice which imply that we are not good enough, strong enough or smart enough to handle situations is when the door is opened for doubt to settle:

  • ‘you can only go there if this person goes’
  • ‘liaise with a senior member of the team to work on this’
  • ‘are you sure you can manage so many projects?’

By being guarded by some sort of authority – parents, grownups, employers, professors – we give into a smaller version of ourselves. We were built for growth. I would even go as far as to say that we were built for glory. We don’t have to go to battle to have glory, what we need is constant growth that will empower us to create a greater impact in our lives, our communities and our society.

Many of us have settled into limiting mindsets before even realizing what we are doing to ourselves. But all this can be undone. Know that we can handle more than we were made to believe and that no one can take away our greatness. It’s up to us to acknowledge the damage that was done and resurrect our sense of self-confidence, self-love and our commitment to grow.


The ‘Prestigious’ Jobs

Photo by Samuel Ferrara

The hierarchy of what jobs are worth pursuing is based on biases carried over generations after generations. Although farmers and craftspeople are extremely vital to our society, the projections of a happy life within four corporate walls and the power associated with wearing formal clothes often place crafts and outdoors jobs into an inferior category.

The story of ‘my parents are farmers and I outgrew them by working in a modern building as a …’ is not as glamorous as it sounds. Outgrowing our parents can mean carrying on the family business if that’s what makes us happy and ensuring growth by making our work more impactful. At the end of the day, prestigious jobs with promotions and stale air without an option of opening the windows are just that – jobs. Crafts are more important than we care to admit and skill growing is not limited to formal education.

You Really Don’t Have to Be Like Everyone Else

Photo by Daniel Öberg

Many people are exposing themselves as being different at the expense of being treated differently when society encourages the idea of a common identity. In the millennium of extensive travel and migration, of shifting social status, with gender identity and sexuality complexities being recognized, it’s time to stop hiding behind preset ideas of ourselves that family, employers and work colleagues, fellow students and lecturers are projecting on us.

As humans we can only project our most evolved form of self on other people. Anything beyond or below our direction of growth is therefor different. Imagine your feet trying to fit into different size shoes for different events – for work you need to match people’s ego, for family you need to match their perception of you and for fun you need to match people’s perception of themselves in order to maintain the association. Before you know it, you went from a UK size 12 to a 4 and them a 8 and a half. Turns out you’re a size 9. You are different and for anyone to acknowledge that, you need to come to peace with yourself.

Are You Comfortable and Are You Growing?

Photo by Andrew Seaman

Ever since we’re born we are being looked after. We associate modern society with comfort and mistakenly generations of parents associated comfort with a positive upbringing, not realizing that this limits their children’s ability of growing.

But reaching adulthood and wanting to stay comfortable even when comfort might mean being overweight, being time poor or financially poor or having low immunity should make us reconsider our choices. It is counter intuitive that eating less (and intermittent fasting) or cold showers is associated with longevity of life, and that not settling for decent wages and the ‘safety’ of employment but taking risks instead attracts growth, but science shows us that some of the things that come as natural to us are not doing us a favor.

It’s time to look at a full 24 hours experience and evaluate your day: how much of what you’re giving your time to serves you well? What can you dispose of to make room for growth? It’s up to us to change how we live our life. Even with different influences around us, it’s time to take ownership over our own beliefs and build our own path. Why not start now?

Auncling and Parenting. The Middle Ground

True or False:

It’s easy for childless aunts and uncles to experience a burst of energy when they meet their piblings (nephews and nieces) and to maintain it throughout the day.

Discuss

True. It’s definitely easier than being there 24/7 and functioning at a high level.

False. It takes willpower and determination to have that presence.

Parents have to make sure that they keep the children alive and well and therefor they do all the tasks that relate to that. Auncles? Not so much.

The thing that fascinates me the most is that the society is built on the idea of having two people in the role of parenting, however the two people often overlap in worries and responsibility, being sleep deprived and lacking focus. There isn’t a balance of interchangeable roles of supplier and entertainer.

Being an entertainer is the most exciting part of the role. It deepens the connection, the love and understanding of the human that the cub is growing into. It’s a privilege that can be shared.